Fall in Texas

The harbinger of fall in Texas,in my opinion, is the opening of The State Fair of Texas. It is a huge production replete with fried foods and flowing beer, cotton candy and candy apples. Shiny, swirling rides and loud music greet you at the midway. Carnival barkers in all of their glory extoll the ease of their games or exotic marvels that must be seen to be believed. The State Fair has always been magical for me. For thirty-six years I never missed even one. Due to extenuating circumstances, money, I will be missing the third in a row. Though, going would bring a resurgence of feelings that I may not be able to address in my present state. I met my ex-husband at the state fair of 1995. That in itself was a magical night. I am not a beauty, and I don't say that to gain a compliment, for without average or below-average, how could we appreciate actual physical beauty? This man swept me up in a fun filled evening, treating me in a way I had never experienced. Spending money and treating my family to everything he thought the fair represented. I was floored, I truly felt like a princess. It didn't take long to fall in love with this simple man, and this month would mark our tenth wedding anniversary. How appropriate that the date of our separation coincides with the opening day of the 2010 State Fair. I am mixed on how to feel about it. While I am sad for the fact that we were to love each other forever, and that it is no longer a possibility, another part of me is hopeful that all of the trauma from the past can be forgotten. He is no longer the man I met in line for funnel cakes. I would venture to guess that I am not the same woman, either. Life throws things at you that you could never expect, I guess that is the way it goes. My goal is to find the way to pick myself up and not be to frightened to try again.